Grammar Rage

I have grammar rage. I should not write in any state of rage, as I believe that words on pages are the most effective types of voodoo dolls, but here I go.

I am not your English teacher. I shouldn’t have to tell you the difference between your and you’re. Or their and there. I shouldn’t have to tell you that capitalizing the first letter in every noun isn’t formal, and furthermore doesn’t make you write like Thomas Jefferson. It makes me want to cry.

So go, English teachers! Beat the rules of grammar into your (not you’re) students’ (not student’s) heads! Smite their (not there) malformed sentences and guide them to comprehensible sentence structure. Small minds wane when uncorrected, and woe comes to those who rely on others to sound coherent in their native tongue.

Rage over.